Men appreciate it a lot, women often a little less. Why does this practice of oral sex divide so much? I always prefer to start with the bad news. Not you?
What are the brakes on a blowjob?
“It’s a position of submission”: oh good? Who can control and take things in hand (or rather in the mouth)? And who on the contrary surrenders? Who takes the risk of being bitten? In short, cardboard argument, more related to our habits and customs than anything else.
“I’m afraid of doing wrong”: there is not much to know, but to avoid doing to others what we would not like him to do to us: to put teeth (or very slightly), to be too soft or too fast, to rush, to take care only of the penis and not of the rest. And, of course, it is good to be receptive to the conscious signals or not that sends you your partner. As for a cunnilingus in sum: listen to and let his imagination speak is still the best way to do well.
“It disgusts me”: hair in the mouth, uncomfortable odors, too enthusiastic penis that rushes down the throat, oral sex is not an obvious practice. So, we do not force ourselves. Never. Like the rest, it’s all about desire. If we want to overcome this brake, we can try to go little by little, act as if the penis was a stick of sherbet or smear chocolate so that it is really enticing.
“I do not take pleasure me”: ditto, useless to stick to it if we do not take his foot because who would like to receive a forced caress? However, even if one could believe that in oral sex more than in one penetration one gives and the other receives, many people have a lot of pleasure to give it. These are very excited by the fact of doing oral sex or cunnilingus. And then, there is also option 69!
“Today is the obligatory passage, if you do not suck you are not normal”: of course, it is not a question of going into the norm, but not of thinking that it is the influence of porn that systematizes oral sex. For it is false: there are frescoes of scenes of blowjobs at Pompeii as well as Hindu bas-reliefs, the papyri of ancient Egypt and ancient Rome. Let’s say rather that it is the religions that inhibited it until then.
On the side of the blessed receivers
“It’s dirty!”: Remember this dialogue in Mafia Blues where Robert De Niro confides in his shrink:
- Do not you get along with your wife?
- No, that’s fine.
- So why are you sleeping with a prostitute?
- Well, I can do things that I do not do with my wife.
- And why do not you do it with your wife?
- Hey! It’s the mouth that kisses my kids!
“I do not like my penis”: penises sometimes do not trust them or are afraid to annoy their partners. To those I would like to say that being clean and polite is enough to be presentable. We are all different, the phallus too, so it is useless to have a stereotype for someone to find fun to kiss. Many vaginas refuse cunnilingus for these reasons, it’s stupid.
The pleasure of giving or receiving
Like anything else, fellatio has the advantages of its disadvantages.
- to give pleasure to someone, which is not nothing, not to mention the one we can take to do it, to feel that we embrace each other in its totality and in its intimacy (for the one who offers it),
- or to receive this gift and surrender completely (for the other).
What’s more, oral sex is practiced in many positions and allows to vary the pleasures. But Love, at the risk of passing for old game, is THE good reason to make a blowjob! It takes a lot of trust and mutual respect to be comfortable with these kinds of practices.
Namely: in The Renew Report Hite, published in 2000, 95% of men say they prefer fellatio to anything else. But beware: to each man his!
Questions and answers about oral sex
We’re going to the end? Everything depends on everything. If we want to make love then rather no. Or if we are tired, if we are tired, if we do not have more finally, or if the gentleman is unkind, or if he does not want more, finally.
We swallow? We do what we want, I believe, but we must know that if the sperm contains lots of good things it can also contain bad.
We protect ourselves? When we have not done the proper tests – yes, because the semen is an agent contaminating sexually transmitted infections such as AIDS or hepatitis B. That said, the risk is lower than during sexual intercourse.